The elusive secret of happiness

Elusive secret of happiness
Elusive secret of happiness

A quick search on the internet reveals some confusion about what the secret of happiness actually is…

  • Keep changing something if you’re not happy, until you are (what exactly to change is missing information).
  • Make others believe they are the cause of it (!?)
  • Count your blessings while others are adding to their troubles.
  • Admire without desiring (!?)
  • Not to chase it. It’s like a butterfly so you must pay attention to other things and it will land on your shoulder (a smidgen of truth, but largely useless information).

These web results leave me dumbfounded! These aren’t the way to happiness, they’ll just confuse someone in genuine need of advice that works…

Given that the only thing we really want is happiness, this muddle of confusion won’t do…

Where to look for the secret to happiness?

Well… you could ask a happy person, or you could ask a thousand happy people, and quiz them all about it. Unfortunately they won’t know.

They will probably get you closer than the above “wisdom” because what will happen is they will tend to describe what it is LIKE to be happy… “I feel blessed, spontaneous, energetic, free, loving and I love to help people.” So they might deduce that the secret is “gratitude, spontaneity, energy, freedom, loving and giving.”

These are certainly some of the qualities of happiness but they are not the secret. That would be putting the cart before the horse. Happy people don’t get happy by doing these things. They ARE happy FIRST, and so they do these things naturally.

So how can we find it?

The answer is to ask someone who has CREATED happiness from misery — someone who’s been through hell. They will know! Ask someone who has done all the seeking, researching and experimenting; someone who’s already taken the journey you want to take. I AM that person and after over 20 years of research and experimentation, the secret of happiness is now crystal clear to me.

There’s only ONE master key

There’s only ONE underlying root cause, just one, and I’ve explained it in the very first chapter of Happy Guide. This ONE cause holds, contains and makes effective, all the other causes…

Click here to read Chapter 1 of Happy Guide

Scroll down to the Contents and click on “DISCOVER THE HAPPINESS SECRET” which will take you right to the beginning of the chapter.

Happy reading!

“Thanks for putting The Happiness Secret together. You have put it in a nutshell in a few short pages. Excellent!”
— Dr. Ed Dodge, USA

“Wow! What an incredible journey you have been on! Aren’t we all blessed that you decided to share your learnings with us and write your Happiness Secret. Thank you so much.”
— Rebecca, UK

Best wishes,
Michael Kinnaird

48 thoughts on “The elusive secret of happiness

  1. I can readily identify with this. People with highs and lows tend only to exercise when feeling in a better mood but I have an eating and exercise routine which has become second nature and am consistently contented despite high stress levels of a demanding job. I used to look at attitudes first and behaviours second but I now realise it is our behaviour that shapes our attitudes.

  2. I’m such a late bloomer, it is ridiculous. I am just now tired of being tired and giving my money to the pharmaceutical companies. This booklet is a blessing for me as it just adds to my endeavor to live better. I never do anything for more than a couple of weeks, the habits come back. So we all have the answer inside us as we struggle to make lifestyle changes that we don’t stick to. This will help me stick to it!!

  3. The most fascinating thing is that this guide came into my life just as I was putting all this together myself. I will make a habit of starting the day by reading it every day, and reminding myself of everything I need to to TODAY.

  4. It’s crazy to see how things happen. I explain. Today of all days I decided to start changing my lifestyle plan, food, exercise… and of course the mindset. Your guide arrives exacty in time to focus all this. thanks a lot Mike & James & God Bless

  5. The Happiness Secret is right on! There will always be disenters no matter what you say or do. As for me, I’ve printed 2 copies..its just the kind of thing I am always handing out!!

    Thanks
    Jo

  6. Very Good compilation! This is a good work that you have done. I have been studying along this line for about 40 years now (since my early 20s) and in the early days the subject was not received very well. But, now, with the good work by people such as you, Mike, the word can be spread around with a greater urgency and I think that this generation is ‘ready’ to learn that which has been missing from our educational systems.

    Keep up the good work!
    walt

  7. Very wise: I have been working to change my habits of quite a while now. Starting with getting clean and sober 11 years ago. I wish your secret wasn’t so simple yet so demanding. I agree this is the secret and as I said, very wise. Thank you so much for reinforcing this idea and sharing from your heart.You have taken your dark and painful past and made it a light to the world.I am looking fwd to your next installment.

    Here’s to Happy Habits
    Thanks, Mark

  8. Thanks for The Happiness Secret.
    I have read and studied health and diet, metaphysical principles and self help material for years and I believe you have captured the secret that everyone needs to bring them to happiness.
    Blessings and much success.
    Dottie

  9. The Happiness Secret chapter is an excellent ‘quick-start’ to move from despairing over a long term negative habit to actually ‘doing’ something to overcome it! The practical, friendly and sometimes humorous advice in these pages are akin to having a gentle teacher/personal trainer who helps you get started. Happy Guide accompanies you on the journey of ridding ourselves of repetitive, destructive habits that do not provide the relief we seek but rather, accumulate even more unhappiness and frustration in their path. Get started, get living, get in the HABIT!

    Liz McGinness
    Psychologist

  10. Thanks for putting The Happiness Secret together. You have put it in a nutshell in a few short pages. Excellent!

  11. I always maintain that we don’t spend enough time observing and appreciating nature. To stop for a moment to marvel at a flower or butterfly etc is a therapy in itself. The other thing is to get our hands in the soil, connect with the earth and grow plants for our own enjoyment. Hopefully this may lead to growing crops to enjoy and improve our diets which comes around to improved health and maybe a lessening of some of the stress in our lives which is such a major factor affecting the health of us all.

  12. it’s good. it’s really a fact for me. All things are all because of our habits. What we’re keep on doing will be the result. Sow and reap… I’m so thankful for this. Through this i will do my best to change the bad habits to good ones.
    God bless!

  13. Time and excuses robs one of keeping life simple and enjoyable. Desires and passion can ruin your HAPPINESS if you are not living life in the present moment. Our thoughts determine our actions and our hands carry out these actions. So you are absolutely correct when you talk of our energy and creating good habits. Conscious living will help to keep one in check. Wow…. reading this has inspired me to be POSITIVE.
    Thank You.

  14. Thank you very much!

    I read ‘The Happiness Secret’. It’s such a simple solution isn’t it? It’s something we all know but don’t know that we know I think. I have a lot of bad habits which I won’t go into but I know they are a symptom of my state of mind and feeling out of control of my situation.

    So I am really going to try and turn my life and state of mind around NOW!

    Thanks once again and kind regards, Julia

    PS I will recommend the book!

  15. Well well well, time for my book :D

    Firstly let me start with how I read your book Mike, when by myself I tend to read aloud slightly as it helps me realize what I am actually reading. On reading the “Habit” page, arriving at “Good habits make the conditions for happiness effortless and that’s the key” I found myself to be almost screaming it out aloud and my blood tingling with realization.

    I was fortunate to have a very connected mother who tried her dearest to set myself and my siblings up for life, not with equipment, but knowledge, never enough money to go on school excursions or anything of the like, knowledge was my out. So that’s where I was heading. I still have 2 or 3 quotes from the wisdom of my family, that I will continue to pursue.

    “The more money you have the more worries your likely to have.”
    “If your going to do something for someone, it had better be what you say it will be.”
    “Insults and backstabbing is very handy, as it points out who we don’t want to know.”

    I had a hell of a start to life. Like your self said in your reply to the comments Mike, “TORTURE more like, relentless torture.” Sums it up all pretty damn well.

    I had a break, though, and that was the start of the truth for me. Upon leaving a VERY destructive relationship, for almost 2 years, I obviously had a lot of bad habits and was feeling the effects of them, all around me, because from personal experience “Everything effects every other thing”. Once I got out of my most recent hell I had invited upon myself, I turned to the wonderful internet to find someone who would listen. I found someone in another state, something i had never even thought of prior. “Another state? Another country? Why bother, they are all the same.” Was my quoted saying before this time.

    The listener I found was a new girlfriend, one who suggested I needed a change of scenery to get myself back on track, to which it took one thought “What have I got to lose?” and about 30 secs to reply, “Why not? It can not be worse than here!”

    27 days later I had my plane ticket to go from Victoria, Australia, across the Bass Straight via plane, to Tasmania (I might add, the first time I left the state and the first time I crossed water AND the first time I got on a plane).

    3 months later, she had broken down and I knew it wasn’t where I wanted to be. Of course her father saw my X’s depression as my wrong doing and physically removed me from the house. Upon climbing into his car he simply said, “You got 2 options mate! go to the airport and I’ll pay for your ticket back or I’ll drop you on the street!”

    Not having anything but my physical belongings to lose I retorted, for fun and with a massive smile “I actually wouldn’t mind going into town and wasting the last of my money!” (The very little I had) Well, he was flabbergasted! I am now confident he thought I was completely insane and chose that opportunity to remove me from their lives.

    With all of my physical belongings in 2 large boxes and 3 large suitcases, I was left on the side of the road, in the middle of town. But I would of died before I let anything get on top of me. I found temporary accommodation and 1 year later of crazy adventuring and amusing tales, I finally walked into stable accommodation, with my own lease.

    At this point I will admit I am only 23 years of age. But through all of my experiences (Way too many to list) I have always favored the idea of focusing on happiness as my #1 Priority! Though I may have found many different ways for me to claim temporary happiness, it was only while being homeless, and having the state of mind that I was focusing on today, instead of next week, that I ever experienced any “Contented Happiness” what we all desire for. That happiness that makes ANYTHING possible, that happiness that reduces any EVEREST to a pebble.

    MIKE KINNAIRD, You have stumbled on the key thing to make us ALL happy people again! The next problem is the individualized teaching, required for most, for changing bad habits into good habits.

    I had this pattern before I read this book, my house is tidy and clean, because any spare chance I get, I clean it. Without thinking of it. THAT is the habit your talking about, THAT is what we all need. THAT habit forming attitude for the most important areas of our lives.

    KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK MIKE, I will be printing a good few hundred copies and I will be handing them out. I wont forget your name and will be eager for anything you might release in the years to come :D

    All of the best wishes, TO Mike and the rest of my brothers and sisters of the human race!

    Peace out :D

  16. Hi! Mike & James

    Great Work. I loved The Happiness Secret. I found it very interesting & helpful & I intend to start today by changing my BAD habits to GOOD habits. I look forward to lots more stuff from you guys I will pass this info onto my family I have tried so many diets & cant stick to one so I am going to do my best to follow your advice & I will keep you up to date on how I am going with it.

    Its high time some-one put out info on this sort of thing I personally think companys feed us alot of Bull S…t on what is good for us & infact its killing us Its hard to believe whats good & whats bad.

    Keep up the good work. I cant wait to read more Have A Nice Day

    Cheers
    Elizabeth Rose

  17. Hi Mike !

    Thanks for a great guide ! – Well said and well done ! I have really enjoyed it ! Its like a second Bible for me !

    Warm regards…

    Suliano
    (Fiji)

  18. Dearest Mike,

    Wow! What an incredible journey you have been on! Aren’t we all blessed that you decided to share your learnings with us and write your Happiness Secret. Thank you so much.

    Love and abundance
    Bec

  19. I am amazed that I have never thought this way before but you are correct in the fact that we are creatures of habit.

  20. Such a well known basic word… habit! I liked your guide, and after having a bad day where I flew off the handle and carried on… which effectively did nothing to solve my problem! I realized that if I maintained the habit of controlling my emotions that I would not get so upset by what people tried to upset me with. If I get into the habit of keeping my peace no matter what is thrown my way I can maintain my happiness within myself and hence show happiness on the outside… much to the annoyance of the very people trying to upset me! So I shall keep this in mind and exercise good habits of thought, good habits of diet and good habits of physical exercise which should then in turn give me the peace and happiness I wish to sustain continually in my life.

  21. This has put things in a new light. I know I have issues, I know I’m not happy, this may just be the most common sense logic to give me a start at breaking bad habits and starting new/good habits.

  22. Hi Michael,
    Thank you for the happiness secret I’ve just started a new course and was beginning to fall back into old habits so it arrived just in time. I going to make those changes to get happiness and energy and peace of mind back into my life. Once again thank you Michael and James may you have peace and happiness always.
    Mary.

  23. Happy is someone who learn and put it practice. the bible says that my people perish bcos of lack of knowledge. I am glad to read this book.
    Thanks to you Michael Kinnaird & James Riddett

  24. I already knew that my habits were a big factor in my not changing my eating habits and some other habits that I know aren’t good for me. ( like smoking, quit 2005 still smoke free! ) One day at a time, for the past few years, I have been trying to correct my bad with the good as you have said.
    Change doesn’t just happen over night, knowing that you have a problem with a bad habit and trying to correct it with exchanging it with a good habit helps put you just one step closer toward the real you, that you wish to be.
    Its a matter of taking control of all of you, and the bad habits one can accumulate in their lifetime, and throw them aside to refresh yourself with the new. I’m working on it, and hope to be, bad habit free soon. Thanks for The Happiness Secret love it, Sherry

  25. tres belle reflexion sur la nature humaine. yes, is it very interesting book. we now about all this but never realise how important is it for as. c’est tellement vraie coment les choses se passe, nous sommes en lien direct avec la vie, avec la nature et on oublie que souvent dans les choses les plus on trouve le bonheur… camille

  26. Thanks for the timely reminder. I would like to add a piece of advice I find very useful: You are NOW in the right place, at the right time and with the right people for your next move forward in life.. (This gets you through every situation; it is very logical, as all your previous steps have led you to THIS point so how can you be in the wrong place even if it appears to be wrong? it MUST be right) AND something to make you laugh: All those guys who say “Urh..now about your money… just leave that with me you won’t be needing it where you’re going” Ha! I make it a habit to have a good laugh every day! Thanks again. Must get on with my Yoga exercises which I started when I was 17 – I’m now 75 -I recommend it as a helpful habit!

  27. I enjoyed it! Simple and straight forward, makes sense to me. Habits are very powerful, good or bad and this can help me focus on the good ones…

  28. never thought about my life style beening a habit gave me food for thought I just recently came through cancer and have been on the internet trying to a healthier way to eat live etc. breaking old habits may be the hardest job I have ever had

  29. It is true. Thanks for the guide, I enjoyed reading it. You went over many points which I have already determined to be true ever since I started taking care of myself. I wish others would decide to take the holistic approach, instead of turning to these so called “experts”. I believe the only way to save yourself, and the only answer for humankind is this: self-discipline. Or in your words, “Habit”, I will definitely reflect more on everything you wrote. Best Wishes!

  30. I liked it very much. :)
    It has an effective approach since it shows the importance on looking at the whole person with everything. There are no easy answers besides the once we create for our own purpose.
    Good and important work!
    I wish you happiness.
    Br, Christian Oterhel

  31. Hi Mike!!!

    Thank You very much… You done and are doing a great “job” … this is only because for You it isn’t only a job is LIFE!!! And that’s great!! Thank You very much!!!

    … and it sooo great to me to come in contact with people who think the same, have probably the same (bad) experience and do and did the best of it: to LIVE and to show out the way to a better now and a even better tomorrow. For everyone… especially to our children. There are so much of “us”!! And that is good!!!

    Always Motivation!!!!
    Thank You again!!!! :)))))

  32. I just finished the Happiness Secret chapter and I have to say it was very insightful. Really an exceptional piece of work. There is a lot of fluff out there that doesn’t really approach happiness in practical terms, and this is a refreshing departure from that.

  33. I’ve been trying to link all the answers to ‘life’ i’m getting for years! But The Happiness Secret went straight to the heart of it all. Indeed, it is what we do all day long that shapes our lives!
    This makes real sense to me now. What we think, feel and do all day everyday becomes our “beliefs” and what we believe, we manifest into our lives. And a good thing that came to my mind is that whatever habit we have, we always have the power to ‘CHANGE’ it because of ‘FREE WILL’. It now dawned to me that i can now shape my life in anyway i want it. I just thought i was stuck in my present situation. Well, i’m not anymore. Starting TODAY! Thanks a million Mike!

  34. everything makes sense, it’s up to each one of us to put in the effort. I realized that I had no power over my thoughts. Whenever something bothered me it completely me took me over. Now I learnt to shut stuff out and not dwell un unproductive or disturbing thoughts. Thanks, Mike! I hope in time i will get better at this and some day I will the master of my own mind.

  35. After all my childhood to teenagehood, I feel like I have fooled myself into depression and other negative symptoms. Now I really want to start a new, happy life starting now, and make changes. The Happiness Secret has totally made me want to do something.

  36. It has given me plenty of food for thought and I thank you for making it is possible for everyone to try to achieve the very best of health, happiness and effortless joy for life! What a blessing that I’ve found your wonderful book!

  37. I have been going thru alot in life and just when i wanted to let go of my little bit of rope i find this and feel like i can hang on a bit longer and not just exist but have control over my tomorrow’s as long as i stay mindful.

  38. Even though I have not finished the book yet, I am already a happier person, by knowing that there is a book that I can go to for tips and tricks of being a happier person. Thanks.

  39. I feel so much better after reading the happiness secret. The advice given was so clear and easy to follow. I feel like my life is nearly back on track and getting better every day. Keep being positive and the advice given will work for you. Life does get better, but you hv to help yourself. Tk care and be positive. Sarah x

  40. I googled how to stop unwanted thoughts (or something similar) and the article you have about unwanted thoughts came up. After reading it and seeing the link for the free chapter I read it. I thought it was great and in the right direction for me, so I purchased through the link at the end of the first chapter. Thanks for doing all you do.

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