“I’ve been practicing the meditation 5 days a week (weekends are tough) in the morning, and it seems to be making a difference. Was feeling better, living in the ‘Now’, and to be honest, much fewer thoughts (in fact, very few).
But over the last 2-3 weeks I’m fine during the day, but when I turn off my light at night, I get this overwhelming anxiety/dread/terror feeling. It’s nothing specific, just the feeling. I don’t let my mind dwell/race on some concerning thought (staying in the now) so it’s not that. But it’s brutal! It just doesn’t seem to make sense… Any ideas/suggestions?”
I assume your soul is tidy?
i.e. you aren’t viewing your life in any way as unacceptable or stressful, and you see that a thing only matters inasmuch as it moves you towards or away from health and peace of mind…
So, assuming you aren’t fueling the fire with insane thoughts about success, and that your good health habits are in place, then we’re left with old conditioning.
You’ve been giving your mind fight, danger and stress thoughts for a long time, and even when we make a different choice, the old pattern continues for a while.
You need to simply not care that it’s there and see it for what it is… old stuff playing out. Then focus on Happy Guide’s relaxation method when you get into bed and do it every night…
Don’t worry about the anxiety coming. See it like an annoying song on the radio… it’s there, you can’t do anything about it but if you get annoyed, give it attention, give it meaning, analyze it, make it a problem, resist it, try to hold it down, engage in any way, then it just make it bigger in your awareness. Always with things we don’t want is to allow (let it be), not care (let it go), remove attention.
So don’t care about the anxiety. This tells your unconscious mind that there is a new situation, the old thing no longer serves and it will die away gradually. It tells your mind “I see you, thank you but no thanks.” Your mind is giving you what you asked for years.
By consistently not caring and removing attention, we reprogram the old trigger/association and auto-redirect the energy to what now serves us best. Soon this new habit will play out instead.
So put your effort and focus behind relaxation… moving your awareness through your body, stopping at each part for 20-30 seconds and leave the anxiety alone.
You may also find that if you remove all attention from old worries, that they appear vividly in dreams. That’s all okay and normal. It takes time for your mind to adjust to the new you and the new way but if you are consistent in new decisions, in new ways of being, your mind will quickly settle down.
The clearer you see what is and what to do, the firmer your decision, the more unshakable your resolve, the more consistently you apply it, the faster you can change.
Oh, and the fact that it’s just a feeling and is not triggering thoughts means great progress!